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Don’t overlook hobbies or side businesses that might have expensive equipment or generate income. And, if there’s a chance that your past joint tax returns omitted income or overstated deductions, you may want to seek an indemnification clause to protect yourself if the IRS decides to audit. Also, taking an active role in the negotiations will help you to reach a better settlement than “letting the attorneys handle it.” You will have less conflict and litigation after the divorce, better compliance from your ex, and better sharing of information about the children. During this trying time, it’s easy to confuse your feelings with the facts.

If you have a PHT degree (Putting Honey Through), you might be entitled to some reimbursement for the cost of his tuition. Your attorney may give you legal advice, but all of the decisions are ultimately up to you. Try to be as dispassionate and businesslike as possible. Going through a divorce can sometimes make you feel like the captain of a leaky boat on stormy seas—there seems to be a new crisis at every turn.

Child support may not be adequate to cover the true costs of child rearing, and she might have lost many important years of career growth, making it difficult for her to get back on her feet after divorce. By familiarizing yourself with the twelve financial pitfalls of divorce, you can save yourself a lot of heartbreak—and hassle—in the future. Legal fees, court costs, therapist bills, new living expenses, and myriad other costs will drain your financial resources.

Money previously used to support one household must now stretch to support two. Divorce is a long, complicated process that requires careful preparation.

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Don’t separate until after it arrives, so it will be community property.